The Quiet Unraveling of August: A Professional Organizer's Story About The Month Nobody Warns You About

Every year, right around the first week of August, something in the air shifts or at least that has been my experience throughout my life. It's not quite fall yet, the light is still doing that thick, golden summer thing, and the calendar hasn't given us any real permission to feel different. And yet — we do.

August is according to Jewish Mysticism and Kabbalah "the quiet unraveling month" because everything almost wraps up, and then doesn't.

And while I do not want to turn this into a blog about religion, the reality is that August has been considered a very volatile, intense and highly transformative time since, well, the beginning of the beginning of time, but I guess ancient Jewish scholars attached a lot more spiritual meaning to the science behind what is happening. So, if you don’t believe in science or religion, I’m not really sure this blog will resonate with you but I’m carrying on.

I actually felt the shift on July 31st…at an Earth, Wind and Fire and Lionel Ritchie concert. 

Seriously, the first song out of the box, “Shining Star”, actually sent me reeling back to when my brother-in-law used it as his kidney transplant surgery theme song during the pandemic and then subsequently was the song playing at the Park MGM in Las Vegas as I was walking into the venue to see Bruno Mars and Anderson Paak with my son for his 25th birthday in 2022. My brother-in-law was in hospice at that point and a chill went down my spine realizing that he was not going to make it through the night. 

I know any song can stir up memories or emotions but I woke up the next morning after the concert two weeks ago still feeling like something big was about to happen.

And then I got a text a few days later from the Florida Department of Corrections letting me know my former step son was requesting that I pay his bail after he had failed to report as a registered sex offender as required every 6 months. 

Before I go any further, the story of why my second marriage ended has been shared publicly with my ex-husband’s permission back in 2015 so I am not attempting to embarrass anyone by sharing any old or new details. It was sadly due in large part because of his mental illness and my then husband’s inability and, more importantly, unwillingness to understand that his son was never going to be safe from himself or others. We needed legal guardianship so we could have him live out his life in a residential facility that would have been the equivalent of a nice assisted living community. But my husband couldn’t wrap his head around it and the guilt of bringing a human being into the world that had no control over his impulses was debilitating. 

Meanwhile, I never wanted him in prison but it happened 8 years after our marriage fell apart and I have had to deal with multiple points of contact since even though I along with my family have tried to get our names disassociated from him every time. 

Suffice it to say, waking up to a text like I did was not on my August bingo card but I guess nothing should surprise me anymore with so much chaos in the cosmos. 

Our Professional Organizer's Story Continues to Unravel

So now what?

Well, I guess I am going to find out if I can get an injunction to block the State of Florida from ever contacting me or my family again about this matter. 

Is it fair that I have to spend time, money and energy doing it? 

No but I also don’t want to spend the rest of my life wondering when the next call or text may come. 

Do I wish my ex-husband would take the appropriate action on my behalf? 

That ship sailed a long freaking time ago.

Would I like for him to still apologize to me for how he dismissed my concerns and fears for over a decade while married?

Sure, but what’s the likelihood that will happen either?

Anyway, I am going to just do my best to continue to work on myself and my reaction to things that are simply out of my control. 

So what does any of this have to do with being a professional organizer?

Well, it seems a lot of my clients are also feeling the effects of August, especially this particular summer with record breaking temperatures, low water levels, wildfires and dangerous air quality. This professional organizer's story is not unique to just me!

This summer definitely felt really “off”.

I could see it in every home I entered.

I could hear it in every potential client’s voice during consults.

It escalates, though, during these dog days of summer, especially with the usual frantic dash to squeeze out the last bits of a vacation before maybe starting a new job, going back to a crappy job, kids coming home from sleep away camps and returning to school or going off to college for the first time, etc.

I remember this feeling as a kid, too, when coming home from camp, though it took me years to connect the dots. It was supposed to feel like relief — your own bed, your own food, no bug spray. But it never quite did. You'd spend weeks building a whole world with people, a rhythm, inside jokes, a version of yourself that only existed in that specific place and time — and then you'd get on the camp bus to head back to reality and watch it all get smaller in the rearview mirror. Re-entry was its own kind of hard because no one tells kids that transitions can be sad even when nothing bad happened.

The Pattern I Didn't See Until Now

Here's the part I wasn't expecting to write about, but I think it belongs here: I realized that so many of the significant relationships in my life — the ones that really mattered — both started and/or ended in August. 

Not one or two. 

A pattern. 

It's the kind of thing you don't notice until you step back far enough to see the whole shape of it. When I mentioned this to my brother during a phone call last week, he suggested that maybe I should consider not leaving my house or engaging with any men for the rest of the month. Never mind I haven’t had the time or desire to date in quite some time, he is probably right.

Or maybe I just need a stronger proverbial suit of armor to defend myself against these potential cosmic threats? 

Or maybe I need to accept the fact that August is just a month where people are more willing to take a leap — new job, new city, new chapter — which means it's also a month where things naturally come apart at the seams if they were already fraying. 

Endings and beginnings live very close together in August. 

Closer than in any other month. 

Last weekend alone, 2 couples in my social circle broke up and while couples break up all the time, the timing did not escape me. 

Why My Clients Fall Apart in August, Too

This is where my work and my personal life quietly rhyme with each other. The wheels really do seem to come off for a lot of my organizing clients this month every year. The systems that held up fine in June — the color-coded bins, the "everyone puts their shoes here" rule, the meal plan on the fridge — start to buckle. 

Kids' schedules shift. 

Summer routines dissolve. 

New school supplies pile up on counters that used to be clear. 

Closets that were "fine" all summer suddenly need to hold both summer and fall wardrobes at once, and nothing fits.

It's tempting to think this is just logistics but it's not. 

It's the same thing happening in the home that's happening emotionally — an old rhythm ending before a new one has fully arrived. 

The house is transitioning right along with the people in it. 

That's why August isn't actually the wrong time to reorganize — it's the most honest time. 

The clutter isn't a failure. It's evidence that something real is shifting.

What I'd Say to You, If You're Feeling This Too

If your house feels quieter than it did in July, or your relationships have you noticing patterns you never saw before, or your closets suddenly feel like they're lying to you about what season it is — you're not imagining it. 

August asks a lot of us. 

It asks us to let go of something before we're fully sure what's coming next.

So if you're standing in a slightly-too-quiet kitchen, or looking at a closet that no longer makes sense, or just feeling unsettled for reasons you can't quite name — that's not a sign something's wrong with you. 

It's just August doing what August does.

Give yourself the same grace you'd give a drawer that needs to be emptied out before it can be filled again. 

And breathe...I mean, do some really deep, intentional breathing. After I got the text I mentioned at the beginning of this blog I had to jump right into helping a client for several hours and as great as it always is to have distractions during moments of crisis, I was clearly holding my breath for the next few hours. I felt completely depleted when I left, cancelled my afternoon client and went home to recharge.

Remember, it’s just a season and this too shall pass...or so the theory goes. 

Be well, be safe and always be kind others as well as yourself right now especially,

Beth

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